Monday, January 18, 2010

On. Off. On on "off". Offffff. On.




Above is a picture of a light bulb because for whatever reason a light bulb represents someone "having" a bright idea.

Maybe the term "bright idea" was around before the light bulb/idea thing came about thus light bulb became linked to "bright ideas" as they obviously make shit brighter. Unless it is an eco-friendly light bulb like the 1 pictured above which are about as bright as something really really dark and not light at all.

Of course there is then the assumed reason of the whole Thomas Edison thing, who apparently had a few ideas, some of them being bright maybe. Or is it because when someone has an idea they "see the light" of the subject thought about. Maybe not the "light at the end of the tunnel" because that is a reference to someone going through a mad-bad time and are usually questioning their existence/life/living, etc. I am not in a tunnel at the moment, no complaints about life really, no draft suicide notes written lately, so this idea is merely like a light bulb I would've stumbled across in Woolworths on St Georges Terrance on sale. (By the way, that Woolworths is so fucking great you can catch me there anytime between 12:00-1:00pm Monday to Friday usually in the fresh produce or yoghurt section. To save you the trouble, the bananas in my basket are always facing up so that means I am single and ready to mingle).

This light bulb in particular represents my realisation that "having standards" is just a really wanky way of saying you have restrictions. Restrictions inhibit and I fucking hate inhibitions hence why I'm always drunk and doing other mind-altering shit like having crushes on boys and listening to people I probably shouldn't listen to. I know it won't be long before I won't need to drink or do anything to bail on this controlled behaviour crap and then I will probably have a lot more money and far better mornings. Insanity is a far better/more original excuse than being drunk anyway.

Monday, January 4, 2010

I hope your NYE kiss was as eye-opening as mine was



1) Above boy is not so confused about his homosexuality so as to hook up with Abbey the YABBY (just made that up then)  2) Above girl knows that Pacey is nothing less than the wittiest, dreamiest boy ever with imperfections only adding to his perfection and would never, so long as her head is left un-run-over-by-a-semi-trailer, consider Dawson in close vicinity to deserving her affections in comparison to Pacey (even though his possessive nature is worth noting) 3) Above couple are not Scientologists 4) Above boy is wearing multi-coloured sequin cap and dresses in such "Fabolous - So Into You" style fashion pieces as this on the regular 5) Above couple never will be Scientologists

No other differences have or ever will exist.