Define: Annihilate

Synonyms: Maim, mutilate, destroy, ruin, wreck, trash, slay

Geordie born, Geordie bred. Hard as nails, good in bed.

Facebook

For:
1) Speak to people whose phone number I do not have.
2) Catch up on what is happening in peoples' lives without having to speak to them.
3) See what events are on.
4) People can read when I have thought of something funny immediately.
5) Find good gossip.
6) Facebook chat is almost as good as MSN.
7) Can easily speak to people overseas.

Against:
1) Will force me get their phone number and contact them personally. Could provoke more meaningful relationships.
2) Can only catch up on what is happening in peoples' lives by speaking to them, eliminating any sort of false or implied happenings. Could cause less fights and provoke more meaningful relationships.
3) Never go to them anyway.
4) That's what Twitter is for.
5) Can find bad gossip :(
6) Could just use MSN. Sick of these shitty FB emoticons anyway. When someone says something boring and/or stupid, a green tick does NOT give the same effect as a thumbs up.
7) You got the internet - You got email access (*in voice of door gym ad guy*)


Then I deleted it. And:

:D > :(

A saying that is thrown around quite often in Mirrabooka is "you either laugh or you cry". A saying that is also quite fitting for the following images:

I chose to laugh.

To Be Chawesome Or Not To Be Chawesome...

You know you're Chawesome when:


1) You say Chawesome (a perfect blend of 'choice' + 'awesome')


2) You are telling American Apparel CSO's about new items before THEY even know about them


3) You can say there is at least one photo of you that could be mistaken for the exorcist:

4) Your iPhone screen is completely shattered (it's so rock'n'roll)






You know you're a dropkick when:

1) You say Chawesome.

2) You are telling American Apparel CSO's about new items before THEY even know about them

3) You can say there is at least one photo of you that could be mistaken for the exorcist:

4) Your iPhone screen is completely shattered (it's really fucking tacky)

What's up your peave?

Pet peave #1 People driving 50p/h in a 70p/h zone. 


I know that the people of Perth don't really have any even slight feeling of urgency to get anywhere EVER, all they wanna do is CHILL and 'lax, which is great, it really is,  and when I want to retire I could not think of anywhere else that I would rather be... But seriously, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE?


Pet peave #2 People asking you stupid questions as an attempt at small talk. 


What am I eating?! Oh! This here is "Toast". It is a "toasted" piece of "bread" which is a baked... SHIT ON YOUR HANDS AND CLAP.


Pet peave #3 People feeding your dog or cat dairy milk. 


Both cats and dogs are lactose intolerant. Der????? 


Pet peave #4 People lecturing you the first time you have ever met them. 


We are only 20 minutes into what could have been a great friendship and you have already fucked it.


Pet peave #5 97% of people who attend BDO. 


Fullstop.

Education is over-rated

Full on.

On a bathroom wall I wrote 

"I'd rather argue with you than to be with someone else" 

TEEN-ANGER

What to do on my last day of being a Teenager:

1) Cry
2) Send a lot of text messages that are at least 5 pages long according to the old Nokia text message measurements (from Sean's phone cos I aint got mine)
3) Get an eating disorder
4) Listen to Blink 182, Taking Back Sunday & Slipknot (and cry)
5) Buy & wear some Refuge jeans from Roads
6) Catch the 60, 64, 67, 69, 887, or 889
7) Go to Dianella Plaza and drink Pulse in the car park of the old McDonalds
8) Have a "flavour of the month" BFF
9) Write in my diary about how no one understands me and the only way I will ever be happy is if Mum upgrades my mobile plan (and cry)
10) Go to "Splash Dance" at Beatty Park and be really awkward about being in a bikini (I have an eating disorder so I'm really funny about that kinda thing)

7 Tips on How To Drive: Perth Style

1) Why waste a whole lot of money on a new sound system for my car, when I can just use my iPod and TOTALLY block one of my mere 4 senses.

2) Accelerator control? What's that? The best way to drive is to slam your foot down on the accelerator pedal, sporadically, but preferably to the beat of I Just Wanna Live by Good Charlotte, and then slam my foot on the brakes 2 seconds later when I realise the 6 metres between myself and the car in front will totally not allow for the 25km/min speed increase I just rendered. Alter between both accelerator and brake pedals equally for the remainder of your journey - They don't put that middle pedal there for no reason!

3) Don't worry if you have a text message to write, at the lights, and waste a good 4 seconds of green light. It's not like anyone has had a draining day at work, and have a shitty Ford Laser that they cannot wait to get the fuck out of.

4) The best way to merge is to come to a complete stop.

5) When you notice that another car is actually doing the speed limit, or even more frightfully, above it, speed up and overtake them. Then when you are in front of them, do at least 10km less than you were originally. I don't know why you're meant to do this, probably something to do with my Dad also being my Uncle, but you just do.

6) Another little game I like to play when driving: Boxing. When there is a car that is driving less than a car's length behind another car, pull up beside them and try to maintain the same speed as them for as long as possible - It's super fun watching how mad they get!

7) NEVER EVER THANK/SIGNAL/ACKNOWLEDGE SOMEONE THAT HAS STOPPED TO LET YOU IN. It's unnecessary, it's not like they saved your life or anything. You gotta moderate those "please" and "thank you's" - This isn't England.

Happy driving!